How to connect with your partner this Thanksgiving with the 4 C’s

We all know the wonderful things to look forward to as we approach another holiday season: friends, family, pumpkin spiced everything… We also know all too well, about the stress that can go along with the holiday season too. But, just as with any holiday, Thanksgiving can present unique chances and opportunity to connect with your partner. To help with that, and as you both navigate all the different get-togethers, here are some tips to make sure that you and your significant other are enjoying the turkey and not feeling like one.

1) Communicate.

One of the cornerstones of a strong relationship is communicating. Good and clear channels between you and your love can make just about every aspect of your relationship better; So too with planning around the holidays. You’ll want to talk early on about each others’ expectations. Do you want to host? And if so, are you hoping for a big family gathering or something smaller and more low-key? Would you rather save yourselves from the cooking (and cleaning) and just make reservations to eat out? Being on the same page will save a lot of stress.

2) Coordinate.

What are the must-dos and what are the flexible things? For example, is there a family member that you must see? Is traveling, whether flying or driving negotiable? Is there going to be a Thanksgiving dinner with both sides of the family? Which side gets which day? Or is it maybe both sides, but different meals? Who gets lunch and who gets dinner?

3) Connect.

Make sure you carve (no pun intended) out time for just the two of you. While it’s definitely time to see other important people in your lives, having a home base with one another is important. Setting apart time for just the two of you to reconnect, get away from all the get-togethers, and to recharge will be a very healthy thing to do. For example, this year, my husband and I coordinated our time off of work so that we’d have an entire day together, just the two of us.

4) Cherish.

And finally, you know that inevitable moment during the meal when everyone goes around the table to express what they’re thankful for? Do that, but for each other and your relationship. Talk about what you’re grateful for when it comes to your relationship and partner. Tell each other something you’re truly appreciative of about one another.

Writer Bio: Dr. Annie Hsueh, Ph.D. is a licensed clinical psychologist (PSY25708) in the Los Angeles area. She has dedicated her career towards helping couples develop more joy and connection in their relationships. She is based in Torrance, CA and sees clients throughout California via secure online therapy platforms.